It’s such a quiet, slow awakening. So much is happening unseen, just below the surface. There is still a drab lack of color in the landscape. But I find some color in the flakes of tree bark. One blast of beautiful red in a piece of bark just under the surface of the brook, under the reflection of black, leafless trees. I’m overtired. I dreamed that my writing on a project (it was a play in my dream) was being misunderstood. In reality, I’m feeling positive about my post card poems, even though I'm not sure others in my group last night understand what I’m trying to do. The leader does – and I was grateful for his insight and feedback. All morning, I was reframing and reframing my mood, my attitude, struggling against a sense of angst and frustration and doubt. Launching my Aim for Astonishing workshops, moving through my doubt, my concerns. A grumbling mood, and lots of self-talk to overcome it, trust my vision, move forward with confidence. A break for lunch with Frank and we talked. I’m reminded of our lunches in the years we were first married and working together in Florida, our counseling practices, our offices next door to each other. We’d get a break and stroll in the sunshine over to the drug store to grab snacks. Or jump in the car and drive off for a quick bite. Time to talk about all of our concerns - our client loads too small or too big – marketing and providing, childcare and complicated client issues – and supporting each other, one step at a time. Today, he listened, and I rambled and vented and understood. Still grumbling I went back to work. I wrote what I needed to write. I was giddy with satisfaction, and relief. Relief. Relief. Just do it.