Here, in this small but significant moment, my spirit was present, satisfied, still. This blue green sea washed stone windswept and surf tossed under sand with an arc of grassy seaweed above it. And, always, the summer lace, baptismal. I have a stomach ache of longing and discomfort and need for quiet and time and undisturbed thoughts. I am trying to sort myself into fresh thinking. I need this quiet time walking the sea where I am whole and apart but know where my anchors are. Today I felt the intense excitement of teaching a workshop tomorrow for writers on this island. It will be a small group but my whole heart will be in this beginning. I will have questions and answers and there will be souls in the room who want and need to say something and they will find surprise and delight and access. Today was not a writing day. Oh, I need one soon. Soon. I have been entertaining. I am not enough at peace in this role. How am I so, so introverted? Deeply introverted, my divine happiness. Oh, to accept this, finally, some day, I shall. Today, perhaps. This blog is a bit of a crazy ramble. I had an insight tonight because my brain is working, working at sixty every minute right now, conscious or unconscious, it's taking me toward this all the day long. It must. Age, time moves this way: be awake. Be aware of who you are and what you need and what you are and where you're going. So, I need to have a conversation with this woman: me, at 90. I would like to know her, who she is, what has satisfied her. What is it she would tell me - what is it she wants me to know, and how will I get this time with her, this is my question, and I trust I will find a way. Let her come in a dream. Come to me in a dream. I will see.